I booked a bargain trip through Aldi Holidays. Here’s how it went

At first, my partner Liam thinks that sitting in the last row, right next to the toilet, is a great idea. With no one behind us, we can easily stand up and stretch during the eight-hour flight to Phuket, Thailand – not to mention access the toilet.

I am less convinced.

“This is a bit gross,” I say, buckling our toddler and myself into the window and middle seats. “But I guess it suits the Aldi bargain holiday we’re on!”

When Liam stumbled upon an Aldi holiday deal, I was confused and sceptical. I’m not a snob and I don’t mind a bargain: you’re likely to find me perusing the middle aisle of the local Aldi when stocking up on groceries.

However, it would be remiss of me to omit that sometimes, the products Aldi sells are just a little … off the mark. The Aldi-branded Tim Tams aren’t quite as caramelly as the real deal; the bread is a little less crisp. And its soft goat cheese is certainly no Meredith’s.

But Liam gets me when I am tired, and the reality of the sort of holiday we used to take – booking Airbnbs in strange cities; hopping on and off planes every four days; going on street food tours and swimming with manta rays in Indonesia – is over with a three-year-old kid in tow.

Kids like playgrounds and tiny pools with matching tiny slides, white bread with jam from buffets, and water parks. They like to sleep in the same bed each night and know what is happening the next day.

Aldi is offering all this and more for the low price of $3965 (after some solid negotiations first – don’t be afraid to ask for a better deal). This includes return flights to Phuket for three; eight nights at Novotel Phuket Kata Avista Resort and Spa; a full-day Coral Island and Racha Island Tour; free daily buffet breakfast, plus your choice of lunch or dinner; daily drinks from the main bar; a free Thai massage per guest; kids’ room and amenities, and more.

It sounds too good to be true, but we figure that for under $4000 in Thailand, we can afford to fork out a bit more if something goes wrong.

So here we are, on a plane, sitting next to the toilet. The initial few hours are fine; the excitement of travelling to a far-flung destination has not yet settled into the weary monotony that is economy flying.

Then the toilet lines start. “Ugh,” Liam groans. He slowly sinks his head into the hood of his jumper, trying to block his nose. Eventually, he asks if he can borrow one of the scarves I packed to use as blankets.

Fortunately, the rest of the flight goes well (notwithstanding the occasional whiff of excrement) and we are picked up by the hotel bus as promised. The drive takes an hour, and we manage to check in by 10.15pm. When I call ahead to order food, the staff make sure to have it waiting for us.

The room is lovely: cool, clean, and overlooking the pool. They have prepared a cot for our daughter beside our king-size bed, complete with a tiny pillow and doona. She is ecstatic.

In the morning, we wake up to the sounds of exotic birds and the pitter-patter of rain. Part of the reason the holiday is so cheap is the dates we have chosen: mid-September in Thailand is not exactly the dry season. But, as anyone who travels to the tropics knows, the wet season is often filled with bursts of sunshine, and I figure if even half our days are semi-dry, the trip is worth it.

The rain stops by the time we get down to the buffet, a spectacular set-up featuring breakfasts commonly eaten in the West, many parts of Asia, and … Russia. This is an unexpected delight: as I am Polish, vegetable and egg salad with cold meats for breakfast is one of my favourite meals, so I load up and, to Liam and Evie’s horror, eat at least three servings of vegetables before we hit 10am.

The buffet is also adjacent to the kids’ club, decked out with beanbags, toys, games, and a giant TV, manned by staff members for most of the day – a major plus for two tired parents and an energetic child. (Later, we find out there is also an indoor playground – first hour free – and a small fee for each hour after with trained staff.)

We spend the days wandering around the small village and traipsing to Kata Beach, with plenty of nap and pool breaks in between. Evie loves the pool, and she loves participating in activities such as bracelet making and painting offered by the hotel.

But the highlight of the trip is the full-day Coral Island tour. Despite some initial problems (it appears Aldi has forgotten to inform the third-party tour company of our participation, so we spend a day frantically emailing and calling Aldi representatives to reschedule, only to find success after directly messaging the chief marketing officer on LinkedIn); and the tour guides lacking a life jacket small enough for a three-year-old, the tour goes smoothly.

The tour company picks us up from our hotel in the morning, deposits us outside the headquarters, and then ferries our group in a high-speed boat between two islands of pristine white sand and turquoise water.

At our second stop on Racha Island, we are treated to a humble lunch buffet before being left to our own devices. Evie, Liam, and I alternate between swimming, playing, and occasionally eavesdropping on the conversations of all the other Australian families.

We think we will go to Phuket proper more than we do, but the 40-minute car ride there and back is prohibitive. But for those looking to stay in a resort or simply go to and from a beach, the experience is perfect. The staff at the Novotel are nothing but helpful and kind, and Evie has a blast. In fact, she keeps asking us when we are going to Thailand again.

The verdict

Other than the administrative nightmare of rebooking our tour, everything goes smoothly. The trip comes with a free transfer to the airport and back, so we don’t have to worry about booking a car.

Would I do it again? Absolutely, sign me up. It’s not often you get to rest as a parent of a small child, which is worth far more than $4000.